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I. M. Meen - Scroll Archive (Miscellany)

This section of the Scroll Archive deals with various other scrolls that don't neatly fit into any of the other categories.


Part of a schedule written by Gnick the Gnome:
 -- Finish secret room on fourth floor by Tuesday, January 4.
 -- Fix broken push button on same level by Wednesday,
    January 5.
 -- Enjoy day off for Gnome Appreciation Day on Thursday, January 6.
    Party at Gnorbert's house.
 -- Fix stuck door on sixth floor by Friday, January 7. Have Gned do it.
 -- Fix the hole made by Gned's head in stuck door on sixth floor by
    Saturday, January 8.
 -- Visit Gned in hospital on Sunday, January 9. Bring chocolate-
    covered spiders (his favorite).
Location: Level 6 (The Dungeon 2)
Northern cell
----
The message from I. M. Meen's answering machine:
Hello. This is I. M. Meen.
If I owe you money, the check is in the mail.
If you owe me money, pay up or else!
If you are a Gnome, get back to work and stop bothering me!
Anyone else, please leave a message after the beep.
Location: Level 9 (The Sewer 1)
Northwestern cell
----
A torn piece of notebook paper:
Haven't finished the Meenwalls on Level 15 yet, so don't mess with
them. If you pull the wrong one, you'll get a nasty surprise! There's an
Invisi-Fruit and other goodies in the room.
Location: Level 15 (The Caves 3)
Central cell
----
Classified ad from Wicked Workplace Weekly:
Personal Assistant wanted immediately. Benefits include long hours
and terrible pay. Qualified candidates will have a good sense of
direction and a strong desire to grovel and obey the slightest
command, especially when it comes to catching snot-nosed little
bookworms for all eternity. Interested parties please send letter of
introduction and references to Box 001 at Wicked Workplace Weekly.
Location: Level 25 (The Castle 1)
Eastern central cell
----
A page from the journal of Gnick the Gnome:
I've got to give Gned a talk about using tools safely before he starts
work today. He's supposed to use the flamethrower to burn away
some vines in the Hedgerow Maze, and I'm afraid he'll turn the place
into a giant barbecue pit!
The boss will be very upset if that happens, and he'll turn Gned into
something nasty. Maybe that's not so bad. Gned can break just about
anything. He's broken most of our tools at least once, and he'll do it
again if he gets the chance.
Location: Level 30 (The Laboratory 2)
Easternmost cell
----
An ad from Wicked Workplace Weekly:
Can't find a job? Haven't got the money to pay your rent? Become a
licensed psychic in 3 short months with Bright Futures
Correspondence School! For just $199.99, you'll get everything you
need to start building your career as a licensed psychic! Best of all,
there's no risk. We'll give you a full refund if you're not completely
satisfied! Call today: 1-800-PAY-CASH. At Bright Futures, we predict
your success!
Location: Level 30 (The Laboratory 2)
Southwestern cell
----
A page from the journal of Gnick the Gnome:
December 10:
After I checked the Spider guardians on level nine, I went to see about
finding Big M's lost wands. Gneville said he wasn't the one who lost
them, but we all know better. He once lost his head, and it took him a
week to figure out it was still on his shoulders where he left it!
Gned broke another tool today. That guy causes more damage than a
mouthful of Explode-O fruit! This time, he snapped a pair of pliers in
half trying to get a candy apple out of Gnorbert's mouth. It was stuck
there because Gnorbert tried to eat it in one bite. What a crew!
Location: Level 33 (The Library 1)
Southeastern cell
An entry from the journal of Gnick the Gnome:
Big M turned my crew into stone guardians today. I tried to warn
them, but they wouldn't listen to me. Gnomes are very stubborn,
especially Gnorbert, who was still eating when Big M zapped him. I
think turning Gnorbert into a statue was an improvement, since now
there's plenty of food for everyone else.
Gned also makes a good statue, and today was the first day that no
tools were broken. Maybe Big M should have done this sooner!
This morning I placed an ad in Wicked Workplace Weekly for a new
crew. We'll see what happens.
Location: Level 35 (The Library 3)
Cell west of Writewell cell

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Last updated: October 25th, 2024.